Reward System

[ed: This is an instant classic.]

The following email was sent to the staff after announcing a third round of layoffs and paycuts for remaining staff:
In these challenging times our “We Achieve” program is a great cultural support. Please recognize people who are role models for our values that are so important:


For those who are new, please find the cards that represent each value at the reception desk. Bi-monthly we recognize the 3 people who received the most cards with rewards. [ed: Yes you heard it correctly, they are actually filling out cards of people who demonstrate the above traits and recognizing them for ‘mission statement’ compliance. I wonder what the recognition gift is? Hopefully, it’s a fruit basket.]

2 Responses to “Reward System”

  1. 1

    I suppose the 2nd place winner gets steak knives?

  2. 2

    No, first prize is being amongst the next round of layoffs.

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