Bullshit Job » Meetings

Our Big Fat Greek Layoff

Cubed00d — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 20:53:28 +0000

We have a large group of our team who are leaving us for various reasons by the end of this week/month. We would like to have a get together tomorrow at the Big Fat Greek Restaurant at 11:30 a.m. to say our goodbyes and wish them all well in their future endeavors.

It is a pay for your own event. The managers will pick up the bill for the departing personnel.

Boss Boss

Cubed00d — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 01:44:19 +0000

Dear BS Job, three months ago my boss told us that we would produce a draft without discussing the project requirements with the VP first, in our boss’ words to “show we’re innovative”. Then we’d share the project with upper management, “wow them” and “invite feedback”. [Ed: I love how 'feedback' basically means 'harsh criticism' these days.] We did so, delivered on-time no less, and it sat on the veep’s desk for nearly a month. A week before product launch, VP looks at our draft, tells us it’s all wrong, and we have to redo EVERYTHING! Of course the veep blames our boss and the boss blames us, even though we did everything we were told.

Mergers and Acquisitions

Cubed00d — Wed, 01 Jun 2005 16:03:04 +0000

As of Monday, [Company Name] is now a fully-ownded subsidiary of [Company 2]. We are pleased and proud to be party of the [Company 2] team! As you might expect, in the near future, we will have some administrative changes and benefits changes, as well as a review of procedure and organizational matters. Next Thursday during the lunchhour, we are having a voluntary (but highly reccomended) ‘brown bag’ meeting to answer questions and discuss events of this week. Please attend!

[Ed: What, no pizza? Business meeting during the lunch hour? Maybe they sold to the wrong company.]