http://www.bullshitjob.com Office bullshit, fun stories, pages, office quizzes and sounds Tue, 02 Aug 2011 17:10:00 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 http://www.bullshitjob.com/2004/05/mission-statement-runner-up/ http://www.bullshitjob.com/2004/05/mission-statement-runner-up/#comments Tue, 04 May 2004 17:59:02 +0000 Cubed00d http://www.bullshitjob.com/?p=56 “Create value for our customers by delivering innovative IP based services in a cost effective manner, that illustrates our commitment to a win-win solution and establishes a relationship based on mutual trust and satisfaction. Cultivate our relationships with our extended teams, strive for continuous improvement and offer an environment that encourages our team members to achieve their full potential while demonstrating our winning attitude.”
It’s on my mouse pad, so it must be true.
[ed: Notice the skillful use of the old school 'win-win' in a "bullshit cocktail" with 'innovative' and 'cultivate'. Potently fecal! A little stale (read: 1999) in the buzzword usage, but still strong enough to knock you on your ass! Bravo!]

]]> http://www.bullshitjob.com/2004/05/mission-statement-runner-up/feed/ 0 http://www.bullshitjob.com/2004/05/mission-statement-winner/ http://www.bullshitjob.com/2004/05/mission-statement-winner/#comments Tue, 04 May 2004 16:43:12 +0000 Cubed00d http://www.bullshitjob.com/?p=58 [Company Name] is committed to establishing a heritage of integrity in the marketplace. We will accomplish this by building upon the talents and skills of each company representative to effectively support the diverse needs of our customers. We must also represent our broad range of business products with the utmost of professionalism and offer our customers unsurpassed service, holding true to the company motto, “We Mean Business”.
[ed: Indeed!]

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