Great New Job Title

This just in… So, I had my annual evaluation yesterday. Well, every year without fail, they change my department around (I work for a PR firm). My job stays EXACTLY the same every year, but they call it something different every time. Drum roll please… This year I am… “Inter-Departmental Dynamic Motivational Officer“

Heckofa Job Title

Please welcome [Name], our Creative Services Implementation Coordinator! He will be heading up or Design Team on the new [Client] project. [Name] comes to us from [Company Name], the female online sports clothing retailer. [Ed: Four word title? Wow. Isn’t that prominent ‘female online sports clothing retailer’ out of business?]